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May 11, 2001

Behold the Aerosol of Instant Death

I am so tense right now. For the last few nights, I've been at war - with my uninvited houseguests: cockroaches. I'll put up a longer post when I've had a chance to calm down, and stopped looking over my shoulder every time I leave the relative safety of my futon. I seriously can't cope with them - I'm petrified.

I literally haven't taken more than two steps away from my futon over the last couple of days without taking my Aerosol of Instant Death with me. I eye the floor suspiciously with every step I take, trying to prepare myself for a sudden scuttling shock. The area round my futon has been swept clean (I mean in the FBI / SWAT Team sense of the word, rather than the more literal "broom" sense) but I've still got a few piles of clothes / papers near the bathroom that could be providing refuge. It takes time to clear a pile of underwear when you have to gingerly pick up each piece individually with one hand, whilst training the aerosol on it with the other, convinced a cockroach is going to drop out on you.

And you think I'm kidding. Oh no.

The only roach I have any time for at all is Archy - and I'd probably still run a mile on meeting him.

Posted by chris at May 11, 2001 01:05 AM | Permalink

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